Friday, April 22, 2011

A simple approach to relationship

Relating with people is not about getting entertained. Friends are not a substitute to our loneliness. Just as family is about sharing that bond of belonging so also is friendship. It is about bonding and adding color to our lives.

Pause a while and think of our pet dogs. Have you ever noticed their behavior in relation to their owners or with those around them? Their reaction to people are not the same with everyone. They expect love and attention of their owners. Their whining and animated barks tells us of their intimacy. The same goes with little children. They like those who bring them gifts, edibles and don't scold them. Attention is the watchword here. I guess we are not very different as adults too. All of us seek something from others.

One of the best option to treat people is on the merit of the individual. As human beings we are all different and inherent with shortcomings and weaknesses. Perfection cannot be found in anyone yet most often we try and blend with only those that serve purposes in our lives. Maybe that explains why we try and cater around only those in the line of our nature or like-mindedness. But the beauty of relating is in variety and to bask in that beauty one needs to blend the opposites. Just as the beauty of a music lies in the synchronization of different musical instrument so also is relationship. Don't use the same yardstick with everyone. Draw a line and demarcate the territory of your association with others. After all you don't enjoy a movie dreaming of your weekend picnic. When you are in the theater enjoy the movie and when you are playing get absorbed in the game. Relate with people for what they are and not what you want. If you want others to accept you as you are then accept them as they come.

Gloomy people are naturally avoided so try and be cheerful. We all carry our share of the burden of life. Don't carry about your load and erect walls all around you. Of course friends are there to share and lend but that is not how we should approach our relationship.

I believe that this simple attitude and approach to relationship will help us share a lasting bond with our partners too. Live the moment and share meaningful bond with those you come across. That's the beauty of life.

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